Introduction
Foreword by the Cleveland Tourism Board
The Origin of Cleveland: Why Did This Happen?
Cleveland Has It’s Own Flag!
A Better Cleveland Flag!
Cleveland’s Indigenous Species
How Bone Thugs N Harmony Can Help You Avoid Danger
West Side vs. East Side
Cleveland’s Free Stamp
(Potential) Cleveland Bumper Stickers
Three Plans to Resurrect Downtown Cleveland
Higher Learning Opportunities!
Visit the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame (Hurry, Before They Let Bon Jovi In!)
“Rock Hall 2”
Slider: What Are You and Why Do You Haunt Me?
Terrible Events in Cleveland Sports History
I Wish I Could Quit You
The Great Cleveland Brown Mustard Debate
Draw Your Own Lake Erie Monster!
One Thing That Bothers Me About the 1989 Movie “Major League”
Stuff that Has Happened Since Cleveland Won a Championship
A Heartfelt Plea to Browns Fans with Children
Ricky “Wrong Way” Davis’ Pathetic Triple-Double Attempt (My Favorite Cleveland Cavaliers Memory)
Become a Published Author!
The Chief Wahoo Mascot: Native Americans No Like ’Um
Cleveland Dating On the Cheap
Edgewater Beach Bingo
Mike Polk Jr.’s Favorite Cleveland Bars
A Guide to Cleveland Girls
Three Gentlemen’s Clubs of Cleveland
Great Lakes Brewing Company: A.K.A., The Main Reason Many of Us Haven’t Moved Yet
Mike Polk Jr.’s Local Celebrity Friends
Three Cute Cleveland Bartenders
Slam Poetry Time!
Those Cleveland Tourism Videos That Your Cousin Emailed You a Link To
The 98.5 Mike Polk Jr. Guarantee
Four Great Places to Take a Dump While Downtown
Cleveland Traffic Cameras: Where Can I Drive Recklessly Without Fear of Reprisal?
RTA Protocol
Lucky Make-a-Wish Page!
Cleveland Adventure Mad Libz
Cleveland Thrifting Like a Pro
Cleveland Enemy Hall of Fame
How and When to Tell Your Kids About “The Cleveland Steamer”
Lesser Known Northern-Ohio-Themed Sex Acts
Haunted Cleveland Landmarks
Four Swell Spots Around Cleveland that Make Me Temporarily Forget How Pointless and Bleak Man’s Existence Is